I will be honest with you, I suffer from not having this skill of self control mastered. I would really love to know where I would be as far as this website would be as far as notoriety and recognition if I concentrated more on this site.

I have been feeling this way for a time but I also have a life outside of this site so it is challenging to find my way through my responsibilities as a human.

As we  all do, I suppose.

But as I pondered where I am right now and my goals of this site, I realized I did need work on this one skill (or I feel I do anyways) and grind a bit harder…

As I say that, I am reminded though of another skill that most should recognize to see as far as their self worth and accomplishments and that is recognizing their reverse gap.

So let me touch on that for a second…

The Reverse Gap

mind the gapMost humans that have goals are horizon watchers. Meaning that is where their goals are. The problem with that is you will never reach your horizon. It is elusive and it is always moving away from you, never to be caught.

That space between you and your horizon is the forward gap.

So your reverse gap is the space of time that you prescribe-6 months or a year or whatever-in the past….and what you have accomplished in that time.

Where are you in life compared to 6 months or a year ago?

You should feel gratitude and congratulate yourself for those things.

Hopefully you have accomplished something. I will assume that you have.

A good way to know these things you have accomplished is a journal. A journal is an excellent way to document what you have done as you can reflect back and read about them.

smartphone calendarHeck, you can even just keep a calendar with sticky notes on it recording your completed noteworthy tasks.  Or use of those online calendars to keep notes for the past year.

Anyways, I think you get the point about what a reverse gap is and how important it is to your life and your mindset.

I feel good just going back through my calendar on this site(to the left side) and clicking back through the months to see how many posts and knowledge I have shared with you all.

It makes me feel good how much and how often I have helped people.

But moving along…now that you understand the reverse gap concept, let’s look together at some concepts in…

Self Control

This is definitely a skill that is tough to acquire, but the rewards can be enormous.

Self control has also been called determination, discipline and willpower.  Rest assured whatever it is called, it is important.

You are fighting your own subconscious that doesn’t want you to do anything new and different to keep you safe, also. Another bump in your proverbial road.

Self control has been defined as the ability to subdue our impulses in order to achieve long term goals. I suppose that the impulses partly is your subconscious.

Why So Challenging?

challengingWell, the thing is that if you have one of those 9-5 type jobs where you are mentally taxed for your focused attention, by the end of the day, you are ready to go home and just chill out and not do anything constructive to further your life.

On your couch away from that J-O-B that you use to pay those monthlies…

Plus the longer you just get home and watch sitcoms after a hard day’s work till bedtime, the harder it will be to break that habit.

What kind of life is that?!?

So here is what you need to do. Get into a habit of building self control.  Here are four steps you can use to do that.

The Four Steps to mastering self control

  1. Fist of all, you can start taking care of yourself. Exercising and eating right and just getting enough sleep is good for starters. This will put you at a good energy level to start doing the other things on this list.
  2. Changing your surroundings is a good step.  Starting with something as simple changing your route home  will exercise some different brain muscles to get you started on you new self control trip. Maybe listen to different music or bring some clothes and take a walk at the park on the way home.  Anything that will get your usual routine shaken up.
  3. Distractions help. Get home and read a book or doing something creative that will get you in the habit of breaking the bad behaviors.
  4. Self control exercises like refraining from a usual habit like smoking or eating sweets are methods. Plus this will help reinforce in your head that practicing self control is possible.

positive self controlGetting your self control in play is not easy but it is possible and beneficial to your well being as you apply it.

You as a human are not to be just a drone of someone to do their bidding. You are just as worthy as anyone else on this planet and Universe.

But you have to know it and feel it to be it.

There is only one person who can do that and that is you.

Start looking for your self control, find it and success will follow.

Please pass this along to others with the share buttons and comment below with any other ideas you may have that could help others.